ROTC

I'm reminded of my first year of college at Olivet Nazarene University in Bourbonnais, IL.  I could write a lot about it- I could probably write a lot about anything, though.  But what I was thinking of just recently is my decision to join their Army ROTC program (Reserve Officers' Training Corps).  Classes had not started yet, but I was moved in and was attending the University's "freshmen welcome" programs.  Joining the military had been on my mind or at least joining ROTC where I could enlist in the Army and go to school, too.  But I was looking for confirmation, you see.  I remember scanning, I think it was the book of Psalms, for any verses that I could count from God saying, "Yes, Kyla, go for it.  This is what I want you to do."  I can not say I honestly received a confirmation from God that ROTC was the right route for me, but it was used as an incredible experience.  So why this memory comes to mind is because I'm wondering if I'm doing the same thing, the same "scanning-the-Bible-for-the-answer-I-want" kind of search.  I'm sitting on a rock, in a lake (figuratively ;-)), with North Park University on the left shore line and the Honor Academy on the right shore line (the right shore line is farther away with its location in TX, taken into consideration).  And perhaps I have my Bible propped open on my lap, sitting Indian-style, and I'm turning the book upside down and inside out looking for God to have scribbled the words, "Ky!  Go to the Honor Academy, baby!  I'll meet you there, girl!!!"  In my ideal vision, my friends from North Park and maybe the whole University is blowing me kisses, waiving, and sending me a blessing.  Because I like blessings.  I like leaving, I like changing, but I want what I am leaving to be okay with me leaving and "sending me forth".  :-) 

I would choose the Honor Academy if I was persistent in creating a movie-worthy life story (Don Miller inspired, a sermon off of his book, Blue Like Jazz).  But if I was to do the one where I would be praising God through anything and everything- then I would try to dutifully go back to college- North Park.

This shouldn't be this big of a deal, should it?  Why are these thoughts so heavy, then?  I'm going to cook...